His small penis turned me off

Dear Pastor,

I enjoy reading your column, and these letters that you publish have opened my eyes. I grew up as a goodie-goodie girl. I have two sisters, and my parents always warn us to conduct ourselves as ladies.

My father was involved in music, and he practised his craft at home. As children, we danced to his music. All of us were good dancers. When some of his male friends came to the house, my father sometimes asked us to dance to the music they were playing. However, his friends were never allowed to touch us.

I am writing to you today as a nurse. My two sisters became teachers. When I was 25, one of my friends told me that he had been admiring me from the time I was a girl. He said he was not ready to settle down at the time. I told him I did not see him as a husband. To me, he was just a friend.

We started to date and I realised I was falling in love with him. I did something that was bad. I asked him to show me his 'motion' and he was eager to drop his pants to show me what he had. This man's penis was smaller than a six-month-old baby's. I told him to pull up his brief, and that what he has wouldn't help me.

You see, by the time I was 25, I had slept with a number of guys. A couple of them were doctors. So this guy who knew me as a child was disappointed when I turned him down. My two sisters are married. One of them has two children and the other has one. Their husbands are wonderful guys. They used to tell me that I am too choosy. I liked men who are tall and 'gifted'. I am sure you know what I mean.

As a nurse, I have earned good salary working in the United States of America. I am not yet married, but I am now in a committed relationship. He is the only man that I am prepared to marry. He does not push me around; he respects me. His parents are Jamaican, but he was born in America. He considers himself Jamaican. My parents are eager to meet this man and we would like to have our wedding in Jamaica.

When I read the letters in your column, I say to myself, after all I am not very rude. I hope my father will not see this letter, but I do enjoy having sex with my man while listening to some of the music my father used to play when I was a girl. I love reggae music and my boyfriend love reggae, too. Sometimes when we are having a good time, we love to make love while we are playing some dirty songs. It gives us good vibes. I have never discussed what I am saying to you with any of my sisters.

Right now they are glad to know that I have finally found a man. If everything goes well, we would love to get married next year, about June. It might even be earlier, because I am tired of using protection. I would love to have a baby soon.

Wish me luck, my pastor. We would like to contact you when we set a date to come to Jamaica.

R.

Dear R.,

I am happy to know that you have finally found a man who is willing to marry you. This man has Jamaican roots. His parents are Jamaicans, so he considers himself Jamaican.

You are not a saint; you have been doing what many young women do. Some were careless with themselves and they have ended up having many children. You did not engage in unprotected sex, but that does not mean that you were a saint.

I will not comment on the type of songs and music that you love to hear while you are making love. I wish you the very best as you plan your wedding date.

Pastor